You did it. National security journalist Ken Klippenstein says mainstream media are missing the story behind President Trump’s decision to fire Kristi Noem as Homeland Security secretary: “The people of Minneapolis, Chicago and Los Angeles deserve credit.”
■ Gov. Pritzker to Noem on Twitter X: “Don’t let the door hit you on the way out.”
■ A Tribune editorial: “It is a shame that Noem’s pitiful performance as homeland security secretary reportedly wasn’t the primary reason for her dismissal.”
■ Trump calls her “a fine person,” but says replacing her “wasn’t a hard choice.”
■ Columnist Brian Tyler Cohen suggests this moment sealed her fate.
■ Late night had fun with Noem’s next job: “Same joke, four ways.”
Next. Trump’s selection of Sen. Markwayne Mullin to replace Noem, in the words of the What Did Trump Do Today? blog, “underscores the administration’s fixation on loyalty over competence.”
■ His pick would leave an Oklahoma Senate seat vacant—but Oklahoma’s Republican governor gets to pick the replacement.
■ Satirist Andy Borowitz: “Mullin Now Romantically Linked to Corey Lewandowski.”
Moms at large. Cook County prosecutors have suspended 21 cases filed against Immigration and Customs Enforcement protesters—including 15 mothers who hopped concrete barricades.
■ One of those women says she hopes their experience will inspire others: “There are so many small things that people can do … for our democracy and the country that we want to see.”
‘A sadist’s poetry of love.’ Author and filmmaker Steven Beschloss calls out Defense Secretary Hegseth’s celebration of “death and destruction from the sky all day long” in the war on Iran.
■ The House has followed the Senate’s lead in rejecting a resolution to curb the president’s ability to wage that war.
■ Columnist Jeff Tiedrich: “Congratulations, Republicans—you own this shithole mess.”
■ Updating coverage: With U.S. support, Israeli warplanes have been bombarding Iran and Lebanon.
■ The death toll in Lebanon has passed 200.
Fresh meat. The Justice Department has released more files related to Trump’s convicted and dead sex-offender pal, Jeffrey Epstein—this time, involving charges from a woman who said she was around 13 when Epstein flew her to a location where she bit Trump after he tried to assault her sexually.
■ A Jan. 6, 2021, rioter pardoned by Trump has been sentenced to life in prison for molesting two kids.
‘A candidate frenzy.’ With Congress on track for record turnover, the AP says “Illinois is having one of its most frenzied primary elections in years.”
■ Need a scorecard? The newly updated Chicago Public Square Voter Guide Guide has a bunch.
Democracy’s ‘5-alarm fire.’ Philadelphia Inquirer columnist Will Bunch (gift link): The Texas primary exposed Republicans’ plans to rig the midterms.
■ On the other hand: Columnist S.E. Cupp says “Trump’s GOP, in its bloodlust for lefty scalps, still doesn’t realize it keeps handing the opposition giant gifts … thanks to Trump’s ham-fisted attempts at censoring them.”
Farewell, Rev. Thousands of people—including former presidents Obama, Clinton and Biden—were gathered in Chicago today at a “people’s celebration” for civil rights champion Jesse Jackson, who died Feb. 17.
■ The service was to stream live here at 11 a.m. Chicago time.
‘Bombs, billions, zebrafish and Kansas IDs.’ You’ll find ’em all in the latest challenge from The Conversation’s quizmaster, past Jeopardy! Tournament of Champions winner Fritz Holznagel.
■ Your Chicago Public Square columnist’s score: 7/8.■ Not so hot on City Cast’s Chicago-centric news quiz: 2/5.
‘We may have underestimated the damage.’ A Trib editorial reminds readers of its prediction two years ago that the acquisition of Discover by Capital One would yield little good …
■ … and, sure enough, Capital One has cut more than 1,100 workers at Discover’s old suburban HQ.
■ In what The Wall Street Journal calls an “unexpected downturn,” the U.S. lost 92,000 jobs last month.
■ Cumulus Media, owner of four Chicago radio stations, has filed for bankruptcy—again.
Dingus of the Week. Men Yell at Me columnist Lyz Lenz’s pick: McDonald’s CEO Chris Kempczinski …
■ … whose promotional video was the subject of a brutal deconstruction by Stephen Colbert.
■ The Onion: “EPA Unveils Plan To Make Water Chunkier.”
‘At this stage of my life, my definition of aging well is still not dead.’ And yet, Pulitzer winner Dave Barry took a shot at what The New York Times billed as “simple tests” to find out if you’re aging well.
■ Capitol News Illinois: Illinois and Cook County have helped out more than a million residents by wiping out $2 billion in medical debt for pennies on the dollar.
‘Your printer is snitching.’ Tech watchdog Kim Komando: Every color laser printer since the 1980s has been putting teensy yellow dots on your printouts, capable of linking those pages back to you …
A Square public service announcement
Know an aspiring journalist? Spread this word from the Chicago Headline Club and the Chicago Headline Club Foundation: April 6’s the deadline to apply for the Les Brownlee Memorial Scholarship. A committed undergrad attending a Chicago-area institution can land $5,000. Apply here.



